I Miss Her

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It was a very quiet and normal warm day in Beach City, and the same was true at the home of Steven Universe. Steven, however, was no where to be seen. On nice days like this, he was out with Connie, which allowed the Crystal Gems to have a break from his antics, and enjoy some peace and quiet. Of course, that was assuming that there were no pressing missions to go on, and that no gem creatures were attacking the house. It appeared that today, the Crystal Gems were free from worry for just a small moment in time.

Amethyst strolled into the kitchen, no doubt intending to raid the refrigerator for dairy products. As her fingers wrapped around the handle, she heard a quiet sniffle from somewhere in the room. She turned around, peeking over the island counter top, surveying the area for who or what it could be. The violet gem would have missed the figure huddled in a ball on the couch, had she not made a raspy, shuddering noise as Amethyst's eyes glanced over her.

A confused but curious look spread across Amethyst's face. She leapt over the counter, landing with a thump next the furniture that held the palest gem. The figure gave a small jerk, no doubt surprised by the sound, but didn't move from her position.

Pearl was facing away from the room, her face buried in the back of the couch. Her knees were scrunched up to her chest, and her arms were wrapped around herself.

“Hey Pearl! What's going on?” Amethyst tried to sound like her usual chipper self, in an attempt to lighten the mood. She could see that Pearl didn't appear to be in a very good mood. She was never good at confronting her own emotions, so when it came to comforting others Amethyst was not very tactful.

Several seconds passed as Amethyst stood there awkwardly, wondering if she should just walk away and forget about the whole thing. But, she knew that Pearl was her friend, and deep down she actually cared if her fellow gems were hurting. If there was anything Amethyst was an expert on, it was feeling hurt.

Pearl took a deep breath. “Just-” The first word came out as if she was angry, which was an often occurrence when Amethyst was around. She let out the breath in a defeated sigh, as if the fight she'd had in her when she began the sentence was suddenly drained from her. “-leave me alone.”

Amethyst rolled her eyes and gave an annoyed sigh. She hated when Pearl got like this. Amethyst hated it because she hated caring and she hated feeling things. Garnet wasn't around, so she knew she'd have to be the one to deal with Pearl.

“Say, Pearl...” Amethyst gave a small cough. “Do you... wanna... talk about it?” She tried to sound like she actually meant it, but she wasn't sure she pulled off the facade of being considerate.

To her surprise, Pearl turned over and sat up slowly, all the while running her arm across her eyes. Her face was still sticky and wet, glistening with leftover tears. She sniffled, her body giving a mighty shudder as she did so. It took her a moment to compose herself, before she said,

“Oh, you know... it's just one of those days.” She stared down at her hands, not wanting to look up at Amethyst. A few more tears escaped her eyes, trickling down off her face to land on her knees.

Before Amethyst could stop herself, a sarcastic reply had flown from her lips. “One of those days where you're a sad sack?” It was an automatic reaction, one learned from years of being at odds with Pearl. This time, she regretted it the instant she said it. Before she could even try to say something to make things right, Pearl was on her feet.

“This is why I told you to go away!” she yelled, before taking off toward the temple gate.

The guilt that Amethyst suddenly felt was growing, and she knew she had to set things right.

“Pearl, wait!” she called out, running forward to grab Pearl's arm before she could reach the portal to her room. “I didn't mean it!” Pearl struggled against Amethyst's grasp, trying to break free. She was beyond the point of giving Amethyst a second chance. She was not in the mood for the younger gem's antics.

Amethyst wrapped her free arm around the slender gem. “Please, Pearl?” She let go of her arm, so that both arms could embrace Pearl. “I hate it when you get like this.” Amethyst certainly did hate caring, but more so she hated seeing those that she loved be hurt. Even though she wasn't always the most deft, secretly she had a good heart. She squeezed Pearl a little tighter, desperately wanting her to know that she was there for her.

Pearl paused for a moment, debating whether she should shove Amethyst off and run away, or just give in and let the purple gem see her at her weakest point. While they were both standing there in silence for a few moments, Amethyst spoke up.

“I'm sorry for what I said.” Amethyst apologized. She slid her arms from around Pearl, letting them lay at her sides. She stared down at the floor, away from the other gem. “This seems to be happening a lot lately. P-Pearl? Are you going to be okay?” Even though Pearl couldn't see her face, secretly Amethyst had started to cry too. Much as she didn't want to admit it, she was worried about Pearl.

Suddenly, Pearl spun around, dropping to her knees and flinging her arms around Amethyst. She buried her face in her shoulder, sobbing and quivering. Amethyst slowly and tenderly wrapped her arms around Pearl again, taking a quick glance around to make sure no one was watching. Sure, she cared about Pearl, but she still had a reputation to uphold.

Amethyst ran her hand from Pearl's forehead to the nape of her neck and back again, trying to calm her down. Much as she wanted to comfort Pearl, she desperately hoped that no one walked on in them like this. Amethyst didn't like admitting that she cared. It took a few minutes of sniffling and blubbering before Pearl regained control of herself.

“I miss her so much. I always wanted to be the one that protected her. But she was the one who was always protecting me. Steven's getting older, and I'm realizing... she's not coming back.” Pearl almost broke into another bout of sobs, but she managed to control herself for a few more second. “I miss our broken friends. I miss home. I'm not a even good parent!” Her arms squeezed Amethyst, wrapping around as tightly as they would go, as her body quivered while more tears poured down her face.

In turn, Amethyst tightened her embrace as well. “Pearl! You're a much better mom than me, and even Garnet. You may not know everything about being an Earth mom, but you're smart and nice and super organized.” She didn't mention how much she missed Rose too. If she had, she would have to think about all the times they'd shared together, and how Greg took her away, and how sometimes she hated Steven because he was just a reminder-

“I always thought that, maybe... when Steven... when his human lifespan was over, maybe...” Pearl sighed heavily, her grip on her friend easing as she sat back and wiped her eyes. “But when the gem started to change his age, I realized that it could keep him alive for a normal gem lifespan.”

“I'm sorry Pearl. I miss her too.” Amethyst fought back tears, trying to be strong for her friend. It looked like Pearl was just starting to calm down. She didn't want to risk upsetting her again.

“I never imagined that I would have to live life without her. I worked so hard to protect her.” Pearl balled her hands into fists and slammed them against her knees in frustration, beginning to tear up again. “Why did she have to go?!” Pearl cried out, her eyes turning to Amethyst, looking for answers she knew the other gem did not have.

Amethyst could only stare in shock and uncertainty for a few moments. “Listen, P. Rose cared about all of us, a lot. Maybe she, or maybe Garnet saw, what the future would be like if she stayed. Imagine if we'd all been captured by Peridot and Jasper. Rose would be just as defenseless as we were when we were imprisoned. But because Steven is half human, he's affected different by gem technology. Maybe Rose knew that none of us would have a future if she didn't give herself up this way.” Amethyst looked away from Pearl, surprised by the encouraging words that had come from her own mouth.

“You know,” said Pearl, “Rose was always telling me how proud she was of you. Of how far you'd come, and how much you'd grown. About what a great warrior you were turning out to be. I don't think she realized just how smart you'd be too.”

Amethyst couldn't help blushing a little bit at that, giving a weak smile. For a gem like Pearl to call her smart was quite a compliment. Pearl was always so knowledgable and prepared, while Amethyst barely thought before taking action. “Uh, thanks.” She rubbed the back of her neck awkwardly. “It was just something I'd been thinking about.”

Suddenly Pearl jumped to her feet, throwing her arms around Ameythst. “I'm glad that she saw the good in you.”

Amethyst gave a sigh, but returned the hug. She didn't like getting all sappy, but she knew Pearl needed this right now. And, even though she probably wouldn't admit it, it was nice to feel loved. They stayed that way for a few minutes, feeling the closeness of their gems.

It was only when they heard the warp pad activate that Amethyst quickly pushed Pearl off. Pearl didn't seem to mind, and the two stood next to each other as if nothing had been happening.

“Hey.” Garnet said. “What have you two been up to?” Garnet could always sense when something was off, and she could tell they were hiding something. Whatever it was, though, it wasn't very important.

“Oh, you know, just hanging out.” Amethyst shrugged nonchalantly.

“Okay.” Garnet looked at the both of them for a second more, before silently turning around and heading to her room.

“Well, I'm going to make a sandwich.” Amethyst said, once Garnet was gone. She headed for the kitchen and began pulling ingredients from the cupboards and fridge.

“Amethyst?” Pearl spoke up, walking over to sit at the island counter.

The purple gem turned to look at the white gem. “Yeah, P?”

“Thank you.”

“Yeah, well... just don't mention it.” Amethyst set the food in her arms down on the counter and went back to making her sandwich.

Pearl reached across the counter to ruffle Amethyst's hair playfully. “I promise. So long as you remain my friend.” she smiled.

“I guess I can agree to that.” Amethyst replied reluctantly, but she smiled to. “So, do you want to share a friendship sandwich?” she added, waving a plate with a mound of food on it in Pearl's face.

“No.”